If you're miserable because of circumstances, it isn't really the circumstances. Your misery is a result of what you allow to get to you. Horrible things may happen. How much you allow them to drag you is up to you. The one thing you have complete control over is your reaction. That may not seem … Continue reading Allow
Tag: choice
Your Pace
For the most part, your life is run according to your own pace. Sure, you have obligations and commitments, but they are from your own choices. Even if they don't feel like it. After all, you are the one who woke up to this day in your life. No one else even has the ability … Continue reading Your Pace
Decisions
Decisions can be extremely hard if you put too much pressure on yourself in making them. If you think you'll fail miserably, or something awful will happen if you make the wrong choice, then you've put an unbearable amount of pressure on the decision. But, who said you knew all of the outcomes? Ease up … Continue reading Decisions
Path
Love is the path of Heaven. Fear is the path of Hell. These are not final destinations. They are the paths of Heaven or Hell, not to them. Your choices dictate what path you are on. The final judgement is in your hands. It's been given to you for you to decide. And, you decide … Continue reading Path
Choose
Everything in this life is about a choice. Even if you refuse to make a choice, you've chosen to do so. Even if you fail to make a choice, you've chosen to do so. If your choice is taken away from you, and you allow that, you've made a choice. If you insist that you … Continue reading Choose
New
Every new day is a chance at a fresh start, a new chapter. Begin each new day with a clean slate. Leave yesterday to the past. You can begin anew anytime you want. And the choice is all yours. No one else can live your life for you. So don't let them determine how you … Continue reading New
Fences
You've got to make a decision. I read somewhere that you can't sit on a fence for long, because it hurts. It made a vivid point. Fences are good for keeping one side separate from another, but they make awfully spiky seats. So, pick a side, and make your peace with it. Better yet, make … Continue reading Fences
Heart-Centered
When faced with a choice, I believe it's important to follow your heart. Choices that are heart-centered work out best for all involved. Haven't you noticed how the less heart is given to matters, the harsher and colder things turn out? We need more acts that are heart-centered and less harsh-headed. After all, fear is … Continue reading Heart-Centered
Freedom
We are privileged to be given many freedoms in this country. But, freedom doesn't exclude anyone from consequences. Freedom of choice is just that, it is about the choices you are free to choose from. However, every single choice has an inherent consequence. Thinking you get to be free from consequences defies the law of … Continue reading Freedom
Everyday Habits
If you truly want to know the reason for the state of your life, look towards your everyday habits. It isn't because of some overbearing overlord, or an invisible power like destiny or fate. It is simply the culmination of your mundane, and oh, so small, everyday habits. Like how you wake up. How much … Continue reading Everyday Habits
Take Your Time
It's very easy to forget that your life is yours. Part of it is to blame on others trying to manipulate you. Part of it is your own choice. It's easier to give the responsibility for the state of your life to others, and claim you have no options. But that isn't really true. You … Continue reading Take Your Time
Bravery
Bravery is not a matter of eliminating fear. Fear is not to be eliminated, it's merely an ever-present option. So, bravery isn't eliminating it, but rather choosing to act in love despite fear being present. Love is the other option. Choose love. And choosing love, despite the looming shadow of fear, is a remarkable act … Continue reading Bravery
Say When
Food servers sometimes offer great wisdom. They gain it from dealing directly with people and helping them get what they need. Like offering cracked pepper on a dinner salad. The quick catchphrase they offer when crushing the pepper is, "say when." This lets you know that you get to determine the perfect amount of pepper … Continue reading Say When
Frustration
There are times when you want to give up. There are times when it can be so frustrating you just want to cry or scream or throw something. Frustration is painful, but it's also a great teacher. It's such a strong emotion because it is telling you that you are pushing too hard. The next … Continue reading Frustration
Justify
It has always seemed pretty clear to me that it is a whole lot easier to do the right thing than it is to try and justify your actions. It's easier to speak up than it is to justify why you allowed amoral behavior. It's easier to tell the truth than it is to justify … Continue reading Justify
Out There
Out there is full of distractions, dream results, and disappointments. But out there is really only a reflection of what's going on inside. From inside you choose what to focus on, be it a goal or a distraction. From inside you choose what your dreams are and what achieving them looks like. And from inside … Continue reading Out There
Freedom
Searching and hoping for freedom, while you essentially have it, is actually choosing bondage. You can't search for freedom and experience it at the same time. The searching implies that you don't believe you have it. We are blessed with the most important freedom there is, which is free will. Realize you have it, and … Continue reading Freedom
Bright Side
The secret is that we get to choose how we perceive everything. The strange thing is that most of us choose to see things negatively. But there's liberation, and ultimately power in choosing to look on the bright side. It's your choice. Wouldn't you rather look on the bright side?
Attitude
Your experience of anything depends on the attitude that you bring to it. Whether it's a party, a spin class, or your job, you'll either have a great time, or be miserable all because of your attitude, rather than the situation. It's your life. You have the choice to enjoy it and see the value … Continue reading Attitude
Uplift
Uplift when you can, but don't take responsibility for other people's happiness. It's very easy to confuse the two. Wanting to be someone who always uplifts those around them is commendable, but the choice to be happy is a personal one. We just can't make that choice for someone else. It's also important to be … Continue reading Uplift
Kindness
It takes intention to choose kindness, but ultimately it's a stress-free choice. Being kind holds no dishonesty or resistance with it. Being kind helps your heart feel light and free. Sometimes being kind means separating or even ending a relationship. Sometimes being kind means not giving something materialistic to your loved one even when they … Continue reading Kindness
Advice
It's nice to have someone to turn to for advice. And it's nice to be equipped with advice to give out. But, always remember that we are each empowered to choose for ourselves in how we wish to conduct our own lives. Advice can offer you an option that you didn't realize you had, but … Continue reading Advice
Done
There's no need to stress about getting it all done, because it never is done. And there's no sense in resting on your laurels, because, well, it really is never done. Time continues to march on. The wheel of life keeps on turning. Sometimes you're high on top, and sometimes you're low on the bottom. … Continue reading Done
Inside Job
They say that happiness is an inside job. In other words, your happiness has to come from within yourself. It doesn't come from any external factor. It's not really a hard concept to accept. It's not even all that mystical, or woo-woo. Everything we experience comes from our mind experiencing it. Every emotion we feel … Continue reading Inside Job
Decide
Before you can be, do, or have anything in this world, you have to decide that you will be, do, or have it. Once you decide on what you want, you'll get clarity, and then you've just helped yourself get that much closer to it. It's only that you have to decide, you can't leave … Continue reading Decide
Reaction
Whenever things seem like they are totally out of control, remember that the only thing we ever really have control over is our reaction to what's happening. That's actually the most powerful thing to have control over anyway. It means that our happiness is in our power. We get to choose if we want to … Continue reading Reaction
Choose
A peaceful life is the result of choosing to be peaceful as many times as you can make that choice. A joyful life is the result of choosing to be joyful as often as you possibly can. A life filled with respect and dignity comes from making respectful and dignified choices. You get to help … Continue reading Choose
Rush
Do you find yourself rushing through life? What are you rushing for? Where do you have to go that is so far away? Why do you need to get there so quickly that you have to blur by most of your actual life in order to reach it? What happens when you do make it … Continue reading Rush
Happy Choice
Happiness doesn't come from things, other people, or circumstances. It must come from inside of yourself. Just think about how someone could be really happy under certain circumstances, like traveling overseas, and yet another person could be miserable under the very same situation. So it's not the situation, it's the perspective of the person that … Continue reading Happy Choice
Think on that
Everything in this world begins with a thought. And we get to choose what thoughts we want to pay attention to. This means that we get to choose what manifests in our life. So choose happy thoughts. Choose to be aware of the thoughts that run through your head, and if they aren't thoughts you … Continue reading Think on that
Authenticity
There is a lot of talk in the self-development world about authenticity, about being our most authentic self. The thing about that, is we get to decide who we are. We get to choose what we value. But in order to be authentic, we need to get real clear on what we've chosen for ourselves, … Continue reading Authenticity
Happy Life
What if you simply decided that you were going to wake up happy every day? And then, what if you simply stayed that way, no matter what? Could that be the simple secret to a happy life? What would you have to lose by trying it out? Doesn't the idea of happiness sound like it's … Continue reading Happy Life
Gut check
If there was only one piece of advice I could give, it would be to learn to pay attention to your own instinct regarding any issue and person; to do a gut check if you will, and then to trust that instinct explicitly. If you don't trust your own instinct, then your self-respect starts to … Continue reading Gut check
Choose
Give yourself permission to choose what is best for yourself, and then choose it. It can be anything you feel is best, so long as it is never at the expense of another. This is for you. So choose what is best for you. No-one else can, or frankly will, make that choice. It's up … Continue reading Choose
Defenselessness
This may sound counterintuitive, but whenever you feel the need to defend yourself, you're really just creating an enemy to defend against. There's always more to the story besides our own self-focused perspective, and we get to be in charge of our reactions. So when we find ourselves in the middle of a fight, defending … Continue reading Defenselessness
Decide
Decide what you are going to do to have the life that you want to live, and then do it. Don't just stop at wanting that life. If all you do is stay in the wanting phase, then you end up letting all kinds of noise and outside distractions keep you from ever achieving it. … Continue reading Decide
A Good Life
The key to creating a good life is to remember a simple truth. Whatever you focus on expands. We get to choose what we focus on. And if what we focus on expands, then it just makes good sense to focus on the blessings. Focus on all there is to be grateful for. Fill your … Continue reading A Good Life
Respect
The way I look at it, when faced with a choice on whether to show respect for others or to bluntly insist that you are right, respect should always be the way to go. Our society is built in such a way that we need each other's cooperation in order for it to keep running. … Continue reading Respect
Perspective
I believe that because we each experience the world as filtered through our own perspective, that what we see is simply a result of what we are. Basically, if you think the world is full of liars, it's because you are a liar. If you can be convinced that something has a sinister ulterior motive, … Continue reading Perspective
Decisions
I believe that if you're having trouble with a decision in life, particularly on deciding if choosing one way is the right choice, then that means that it is not. The best choice is to stop struggling with a decision. The decision is no. The best course of action is to move on from this … Continue reading Decisions
Choose
Each day we get a chance to choose kindness, be joyful, and speak with love. Some days it may be harder to make this choice, but those are the days that it's essential. Add enough of these days of choosing kindness, joy and love together, and you've created a wonderful life. We get to choose … Continue reading Choose
Wherever
Destination Happiness is a trap. Thinking that you'll be happy, that you'll finally feel abundant, or be at peace once you reach some place other than where you are, is just a trick you're playing on yourself. Even though I know this, I still fall for it and need the reminder myself. The feeling that … Continue reading Wherever
Choose Kindness
Choosing to be kind is practicing mastery in your life. It's such a low and easy choice to be cruel. But being kind is a powerful choice that can elevate everything in your life. Being kind can improve, and even eliminate the situation you thought required cruelty in the first place. But it's impossible to … Continue reading Choose Kindness
Less Imperfect
If there's one thing I've learned, it's that doing the thing you think about doing, and not quite doing it as great as you'd like to have done it, is still so much better than just thinking and dreaming, plotting and planning on how to do it perfectly. All of that thinking is just a … Continue reading Less Imperfect
Look for the Good
The media and social networks have been showing a lot of people with bad behavior lately, and it can feel like the whole world has gone topsy-turvy. And while there are a whole bunch of folks who have indeed decidedly lost their minds (with the video to prove it), we need to remember that it's … Continue reading Look for the Good
Change it
It seems to me that the worst part of standing around complaining about something is that you're wasting time convincing yourself how bad it is, rather than doing something to improve the situation. Complaining has actually been proven to be bad for your mental and physical health. It brings on all sorts of issues, like … Continue reading Change it
Practice Makes Perfect
They say that hatred is a learned response. It comes from letting fear run your thoughts, and by practicing the feeling of hate. So, if that is the case, then love and kindness can be practiced just as well, so that they are our (re)-learned automatic responses. Our actions and our behavior come from what … Continue reading Practice Makes Perfect
Empathy
It seems to me that we're need of an outbreak of empathy. Empathy being: the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. We're not all as different as we like to think we are. Whatever hurts us, most likely hurts another. With empathy you remember how it feels to be on the receiving … Continue reading Empathy
Human Being
A lifelong lesson I'm learning is that I am working too hard at life. I'm making it such a struggle. Can anyone relate? If life seems to be a constant struggle, I suggest you take a look and see if you're trying too hard to control things. That's what I do. I have fallen for … Continue reading Human Being
Opinions
Engaging in conflict with someone over their views is purely an exercise trying to control them. Which you'll never do from arguing with them. You'll just start a fight. The struggle you feel is because you want to control their opinion, even more than you actually want them to agree with you. Because if they're … Continue reading Opinions
Life
Life is all too brief. So at some point, we should start living it, rather than always working on "getting our act together." How long do you need to give someone to "come to their senses" before you decide you better enjoy what time you have left - with or without them? How many years … Continue reading Life
An Empowering Choice
One of the most powerful pieces of advice I've ever received, is that it's vital to mindfully give your energy and attention to what you are for, rather than what you are against. There's a lot of bad behavior out there, and too much negativity, but it does no good to feed it your energy … Continue reading An Empowering Choice
Make it a good one.
This weekend I revisited the amazing and nearly perfect Back to the Future movie trilogy. At the end of the final chapter, after many wild trips through several timelines, Doc Brown concludes it all by saying, Your future is whatever you make it. So make it a good one. That's not just some movie magic … Continue reading Make it a good one.
Choice
We are gifted with free will. We get to choose how to approach each moment. We get to choose if we want to be happy or not. We don't always get to choose what's happening out there. But if we had to wait on the world around us to look just exactly how we want … Continue reading Choice
New Choice
Best Selling Author and Motivational Speaker, Gabrielle Bernstein, shares a great 3-step method on how to deal with anxiety or with any negative thought. She advises to: Notice the fearful thoughtForgive the thoughtProactively choose a better-feeling thought This reminds me of an Improv game I used to play, called "new choice". It's a way to … Continue reading New Choice
Great Power
Uncle Ben wasn't kidding around when he told Peter Parker that with great power comes great responsibility. As you come to live a more mindful life, you realize that in any given moment you have the power to choose if you want to be happy, or if you insist on being right. In any given … Continue reading Great Power
The choice is easy.
In the Bible there's a famous story of King Solomon's judgement. Solomon had been gifted wisdom from God, which he demonstrated when two women came to him, each claiming that they were the true mother of this baby. He suggested taking a sword and cutting the baby in two, so each woman could take home … Continue reading The choice is easy.
Who are they?
There is no "they" to blame. We all make up the whole of whatever we're trying to brand as "they." "They didn't let the right candidates through." "They are causing mass hysteria with this new virus." "They need to stop this racism, this sexism, this ageism, etc." Who are these "others" that we're calling a … Continue reading Who are they?
Like a Fox! 